Young adult chatroulette
I need to start by thanking my co-worker for suggesting this story's headline. "So basically you're saying you want me to act as — what would you call it — bait? (And, though I didn't admit it at the time, maybe a tad concerned that users just might click past me, too. "I was hoping you'd, um, help with the story," he said. As soon as they see me, they'll click, 'Next.'" OK, he did have a point there. I'm not a terribly accomplished drinker, so by the time he's booted up the laptop, downloaded some recording software and signed on, I am no longer giggling nervously, I'm giggling like a half-drunken coed. Or a grown woman behaving embarrassingly like a half-drunken coed. "Maybe I'm just a little scared about looking into the darkest corners of random strangers' sexual obsessions," I say (giggling, of course). I'm not quite as anxious, but we open it up and there we see two fresh e-mails. We chat a little longer, and when we're done, Bill can hardly wait to check my inbox.
"I don't know," he says, "but I think your friend might have his adjectives confused." I give Bill a dirty look. Soon I realize I'm not finding these unabashedly engorged examples of male anatomy to be nearly as disturbing or intimidating as I'd expected. If these guys intend to impress, they've overlooked the fact that their wares are, maybe, a half-inch long on screen. Here I'd been afraid of feeling victimized by predators and creeps invading my living room, and instead I'm feeling empowered. I'm not as young as I used to be.) "Well, that's not how I'd put it," he said, "but ..." He pointed out I could write a story called: "Why I'll never go on Chatroulette again." Then, he threw in a promise that he'd take me along the next time he got a media invite to Ted Haggard's house. I said, "Yes." I guess I have a soft spot for perverts. *** I don't like to back out of my agreements, but I'll admit that when Bill shows up at my house on Saturday night, it takes me two very tall glasses of boxed Chablis to stick to this one.
I can make out rows of identical chairs behind him.